PHUN Gaems: Did u know...?

Did u know wimminz get paid 20%less than white maels on average accordin 2 Baya ?

did u know @dignitator is goin 2 git banned?

I think you misunderstood what I wrote, Mani.

It will be a fucking miracle if anyone ever understands a single thing you ever write.

You have no idea how right you are.

Wait, let me translate that for you: Ooga! Booga! Ooga booga!

The NSA is monitoring this shit. Your Afghan taliban chatter has been noted.

You're now (again) on a watch list.

Oh.

LOL

Like you can travel without a crane, a B-Double flatbed, and a chartered cargo 747.

I think you mean the CIA. The Taliban aren't a threat to the national security of the USA.

I think that waht fatties think doesn't matter.

If you think the NSA isn't tracking the shit out of all global conversations, then you're dreaming.

If you think anybody or anything can track "the shit out of" all global conversations then you're a typical Australian.

I will take that as the ultimate compliment and the most base of insults.

I wish to live in a world where being Australian stands for belief in your mates and a "fuck it, she'll be right" attitude.

I wish to live ina world where we believe the yanks are tracking teh shit out of everything and we don't give a flying fuck.

A world where the beers are high-carb and full strength; and happy hour goes from 4 - 9pm every fucking night.

A world where smacking yoru kids doesn't land you in court, and slapping a girls arse gets you a smile (and maybe a slap in return) and the chance of a root.

I dream of a simpler time.

I dream...

Did you know that my body is ready?

Did you know, all women play games like this?

That is some advanced DDR skill, making her shit land on the arrows.

Until now, no.

Until now, I was relatively OK with women (in general).

Until now, I would do a poo, wipe my arse, and get on with my life.

All that has changed.

Nothing is as it was.

Everything is different, everything is changed. Not wrong; just changed.

Tomorrow I'm ordering some big plastic rugs for the area in front of the TV...

Did u know Nicolas Cage can dodge bullets at point blank range?

Did you know Karaoke means "Empty Choir" in Japanese?

Really? I thought it meant "Middle-Aged Workaholic Trying To Desperately Forget His Miserable Life For A Few Minutes."

Don't forget it takes place in a bar nobody cares about.